And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
