Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.

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  (415): I have had sex with more partners than how old he is. http://tfl.nu/ztoc
  Replies (6) Good night (1362) Bad night (642)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,

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  (250): Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog, http://tfl.nu/g0c0
  Replies (22) Good night (949) Bad night (4322)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like

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  (781): At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like http://tfl.nu/8q6a
  Replies (18) Good night (1557) Bad night (4901)
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.

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  (352): She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game. http://tfl.nu/e2np
  Replies (7) Good night (3082) Bad night (560)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Not even the dog will look at me anymore.

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  (301): Not even the dog will look at me anymore. http://tfl.nu/6y6q
  Replies (15) Good night (1032) Bad night (4480)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.

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  (512): You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication. http://tfl.nu/dq9l
  Replies (6) Good night (3076) Bad night (1129)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.

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  (817): It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart. http://tfl.nu/sgc5
  Replies (19) Good night (2351) Bad night (943)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...

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  (419): having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance... http://tfl.nu/f7dv
  Replies (7) Good night (2688) Bad night (834)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.

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  (386): Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here. http://tfl.nu/vy2d
  Replies (6) Good night (1959) Bad night (739)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.

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  (417): I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer. http://tfl.nu/udvx
  Replies (3) Good night (1058) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  How was the birthday sex?

  (1-610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.

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  (610): How was the birthday sex? (1-610): Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs. http://tfl.nu/8fjx
  Replies (2) Good night (510) Bad night (2091)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home

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  (250): not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home http://tfl.nu/i7w6
  Replies (4) Good night (1112) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.

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  (619): I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible. http://tfl.nu/efx0
  Replies (5) Good night (1311) Bad night (328)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  We're like a dynamic duo.

  (1-647): View more from Ontario

  Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.

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  (647): We're like a dynamic duo. (1-647): Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud. http://tfl.nu/eexc
  Replies (4) Good night (784) Bad night (267)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I am not getting you a goat.

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.

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  (314): I am not getting you a goat. (479): Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable. http://tfl.nu/eqxl
  Replies (5) Good night (943) Bad night (285)

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