Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize