I must be too annoying 4 u.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize