go do what you do best...puke behind churches
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
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