It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
