RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
