Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
