So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
