none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
