So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
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