Who did Billy Mays play for?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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