Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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