I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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