He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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