What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
How drunk are you?
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