question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
try to milk me bitch
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