just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
