The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
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