Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
