Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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