You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize
