your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize