actually, I'm a sock model
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
