I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
So many bounce houses so little time
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
