dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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