please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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