the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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