i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I want you more than these girls want KFC
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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