i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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