I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
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