bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
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