I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
