Texts From Last Night

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  (845): View more from New York

  I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?

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  (845): I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back? http://tfl.nu/r4ga
  Replies (4) Good night (1525) Bad night (590)
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.

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  (623): So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving. http://tfl.nu/wfwo
  Replies (83) Good night (3973) Bad night (1274)
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  (848): View more from New Jersey

  Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand

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  (848): Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand http://tfl.nu/3des
  Replies (17) Good night (1224) Bad night (5471)
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  (408): View more from California

  i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight

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  (408): i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight http://tfl.nu/uzvu
  Replies (19) Good night (4138) Bad night (783)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.

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  (425): Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight. http://tfl.nu/mywq
  Replies (14) Good night (5771) Bad night (1093)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.

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  (620): He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time. http://tfl.nu/dyz5
  Replies (20) Good night (5138) Bad night (1715)
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  (510): View more from California

  i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.

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  (510): i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again. http://tfl.nu/nfnb
  Replies (10) Good night (3501) Bad night (973)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.

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  (917): Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea. http://tfl.nu/2kaw
  Replies (12) Good night (1901) Bad night (1088)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.

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  (402): Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen. http://tfl.nu/czwa
  Replies (4) Good night (436) Bad night (995)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people

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  (425): Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people http://tfl.nu/m00z
  Replies (8) Good night (941) Bad night (589)
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  (969): View more from

  You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?

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  (969): You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll? http://tfl.nu/xabj
  Replies (2) Good night (1002) Bad night (307)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"

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  (609): Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits" http://tfl.nu/28wn
  Replies (1) Good night (600) Bad night (309)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)

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  (305): Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables) http://tfl.nu/t7ni
  Replies (2) Good night (681) Bad night (443)
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  (567): View more from Ohio

  If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.

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  (567): If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you. http://tfl.nu/fy7x
  Replies (2) Good night (571) Bad night (563)
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  (607): View more from New York

  In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.

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  (607): In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe. http://tfl.nu/9256
  Replies (2) Good night (269) Bad night (625)

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