Texts From Last Night

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  (+66): View more from Thailand

  She said her name was "party"

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  (+66): She said her name was "party" http://tfl.nu/08y0
  Replies (3) Good night (2438) Bad night (670)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.

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  (630): Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species. http://tfl.nu/4i2r
  Replies (59) Good night (1439) Bad night (2958)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year

  (847): View more from Illinois

  And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month

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  (847): This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year (847): And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month http://tfl.nu/rprb
  Replies (91) Good night (782) Bad night (3236)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries

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  (703): I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries http://tfl.nu/pohi
  Replies (17) Good night (4769) Bad night (1160)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.

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  (518): I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room. http://tfl.nu/qe4u
  Replies (22) Good night (6781) Bad night (1141)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.

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  (302): He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before. http://tfl.nu/latf
  Replies (13) Good night (1033) Bad night (4349)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked

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  (417): I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked http://tfl.nu/4oxw
  Replies (6) Good night (3872) Bad night (987)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?

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  (920): did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve? http://tfl.nu/wzep
  Replies (3) Good night (1125) Bad night (2894)
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  (209): View more from California

  he laminated a picture of his dick.

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  (209): he laminated a picture of his dick. http://tfl.nu/x5jy
  Replies (16) Good night (2815) Bad night (1564)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.

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  (425): Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years. http://tfl.nu/f3i9
  Replies (8) Good night (796) Bad night (3662)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.

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  (903): We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort. http://tfl.nu/9819
  Replies (1) Good night (1282) Bad night (509)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?

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  (515): Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo? http://tfl.nu/dsc3
  Replies (13) Good night (1554) Bad night (504)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.

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  (360): So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace. http://tfl.nu/c8hs
  Replies (5) Good night (1400) Bad night (470)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.

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  (360): Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable. http://tfl.nu/uogv
  Replies (13) Good night (1264) Bad night (580)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.

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  (828): I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me. http://tfl.nu/bode
  Replies (2) Good night (428) Bad night (533)

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