Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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