What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
