Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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