She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
