I faked an abortion last night.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
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I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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