its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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