would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
It's no shave November. This is our time.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
