if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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