the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
