We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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