Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I'm at about main and main street
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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