please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
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