gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
