your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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