we have officially lost it.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
