I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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