put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
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Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
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If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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