Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
